I'm Still Here

Well, it has been a tough month, so I haven't been around much.To top it off,Charlie knocked my laptop off the coffee table, and it is now dead! More fool me for leaving it where my baby could knock it!
It seems my hard drive is knackered and I'll be lucky to retrieve anything! It is a blow that I will lose all my photos - wish I had "backed them up", but I didn't really expect to break the laptop!

So now I am using Michael's apple mac, which I don't fully understand, so I haven't a clue how to post pictures.This is something I will have to master before too long. I'd like to get back into the blogging, so will need to do that.

This past month I have been so busy, mostly with Charlie and the family.We haven't been doing anything special, but have had most of us suffering from a cold here and there, but mostly I have been tending to Charlie's needs.

He's also had a cold, which followed an infection which required anti-biotics, which in turn gave him diarrhea, and he still hasn't cut his first tooth, despite much drooling and clamping his gums on anything (including my nipples during breastfeeding!).

So, Charlie has been irritable and very needy. I am his number one comfort, so it has meant many hours attached to each other. It has also meant I haven't much wanted to venture out.Poor Freya has been extremely tolerant and very helpful, but my lack of attention for her may have lead her to decide to go back to school next term. She assures me it isn't the case, but, naturally I feel guilty. Freya insists it is because she misses her friends and is feeling much better.

It is true that her anxiety issues have improved a great deal since homeschooling and seeing a counsellor. We will continue with the counseling - I think it really helps her to talk to someone other than family about her anxieties, and to be given some practical strategies to try.
So I'll go and see her school principal in the next couple of weeks to discuss her options. I feel a little bit sad about her going back to school, but I want what is best for her, and for her to be happy. With Charlie being so demanding lately, it is probably better for her to be at school. Freya reassures me that she gets a whole lot more attention at home than at school, even when Charlie demands my attention, but I worry that it is too easy to have Freya help me with baby, rather than doing school work. I have been reassured by other homeschooling mums that it would be fine for her to do no "schoolwork" for a time, but I feel better if she is doing something "schoolish" (that's the teacher in me talking!)

We are only two weeks away from going on holiday! It is exciting and terrifying at the same time! It will be lovely to get away, to go where it is summer (it is very cold here - 12 degrees today-very cold for us), to enjoy the company of friends, but at the same time, the worrier in me can't help but think about the amount of time spent in the car and plane with a 10 month old - argh! Who knows, perhaps he'll suddenly enjoy being strapped into his car-seat for 5 hours straight!Ha ha, I doubt it. We'll have Freya and Lily with us, so they'll earn their keep entertaining their baby brother.

I also worry about how he'll go with his sleeping.I know I shouldn't worry, that it is pointless, and that it might all be a breeze, but, unfortunately, I wasn't built that way, and have to think of all the scenarios in order to relax! It is a paradox of sorts.

Before then, we'll have a week of swimming lessons in town.If that doesn't wear me out, nothing will. Hopefully it won't be too hard on Charlie and his sleeping patterns - he tends to nod off in the car, then wakes up when we arrive home, then won't sleep in his cot and ends up overtired...but what can we do, I'd really like Freya to have the benefit of the swimming lessons, especially before we go to warmer climes where she'll enjoy swimming everyday.

On a brighter note - I have started knitting a new cardigan, a lovely Jo Sharp pattern. I haven't gotten all that far yet (just knitted one cuff!!), but already I love it!The colours are great and I love the texture too. I will try to post a photo of it when I sort out how to do it.

Here's to getting back into blogging- I hope my faithful followers are still out there in cyber space!